June 15: The Gray State

Happy "Smile Power Day!" Now I am not too sure what smile power is, but maybe if you smile all day you get rewarded with like a bizillion green backs or it rains Louis Vuittons. So, I will be flashing my pearly whites all day long. What is the worse that can happy, my face freezes in a permanent smile like the Joker.

Anywho...
Carl-E and I went to my homeland for my cousin's wedding. And not to disappoint, it was gray, gray, gray. Whenever Carl-E visits the Garden State it is never sunny; NEVER! He calls it the "Gray State!"

Well...
The wedding was wonderful, no drama; except...this little ditty!

Ok, here we go...
There were five grooms men; I believe three were cousin's of the groom. Well, one of the cousins is engaged. But, his fiance's sister was getting the same weekend that my cousin was getting married. Are you confused, yet???

Because...
the weddings were taking place in different states, they decided that each one should attend each wedding; so she goes to Texas and he stays in New Jersey. Well, because he is that tasty of a man (NOT!) he had to bring a date to the wedding.

Now...
we are not talking about a "friend" date, were talking a "booty call" date. But, it gets better. He insisted that NO, absolutely No photos be taken of him and this girl together, because guess what? He does not what to be caught!

So...
at the reception there is only one girl walking around as if she just stepped out of a strip club (NOTE: Not the high end ones, like in Vegas but those rat traps that are out by the airport; icky!).

Let's analyze her outfit..,
dress two sizes way too small, so to accentutate her paunch. Black satin skirt hiked up to mid thigh. Flesh colored bustier top that had her lady lumps spillith out all over the place. Those puppys could not be contained! And the icing on the outfit; strappy black platform glossy stripper heals (NOTE: At least she left the clear ones at home).

Now...
This chick is supposed to be a big secret, but the two could not contain their love or better yet lust for each other because they were walking around holding hands and smoochy-smoochy! I tried to snap a photo, but it did not come out. How 007 of me is I totally caugth their tryst on film!

I should of been a spy!

Later tators!