Happy or not-so-happy "Festival For The Souls Of Dead Whales." It depends if your the half glass full or half empty kind of person. So, put on your kamiks, white bearskin trousers, fox parka, roast some bear in your igloo, and do the dance of the mighty whale. I am not sure how it goes, but I would imagine it would look like the "Mashed Potato" or maybe the "Tootsie Roll."
So drink 'em if you got 'em for the might gentle giant of our vast oceans, the whale. Bottoms up!
Anywho...
So, I get home after running to find my house back in the 1700's; no electricity. What do you think the first thing I do is?
Try to turn on computer; duh!
Well...
I got to thinking, "When was the last time I went without electricity?" Well, it was 2 years ago in Tanzania. For 9 days on the mountain, we had not one kilowatt. (NOTE: Except for our headlamps, but they do not count because they are teeny-tiny and necessary to walk on a 19000 ft mountain in the dark) It was so nice, no phone ring-a-dingin, Carl-E spending time with moi not his mistress; Black Betty, and an excuse not to dry my hair (NOTE: Well, I could not wash it either, but that's neither here nor here).
Let's proceed...
So, when the lights came back on I decided to make a list of things I could not do without electricity and it brought both frown and a grin to my face:
- I could not flat iron my mane; I would have to live with a funky flip on the right-side of my head that drives me batty or wear a pony tail until my last breath
- I could not zap my java to get it to the proper consumption temperature after I forget about it for 5 hours after put it down on the counter to finish the laundry
- Hold the phone; I could not do the laundry because my Whirlpool would not go swishy and wishy; How would I solve the problem of icky-icky-poo clothing?; Bring it to the dry cleaners and let them deal with Carl-E's socks!
- I could not peruse my fav cyber shops, because I would have no internet, because I would have no cable, which means I have not DVR to record "Rock of Love: Charm School" (NOTE: What an inhumane cycle of torture!)
- My home phone would not ring; no more robocalls trying to sell me the sun, moon, stars, and a new water softener system that will help save me bank by using less soap in my laundry, but wait; I do not have to do the laundry anymore! (NOTE: I would still have my cell, but I can charge it in my car, see how I figured that one out!)
- My jacuzzi would not work; no more being able to un-knot my knotted back, guess I have to use the one at the pool with the naked ladies; ewwwww!
- I could not keep food in the refrigerator; oh well I guess it is either canned soup for an evening meal or dinner out! (NOTE: I'm in the mood for some bar-b-que!)
So, is electricity necessary?; "Hellz-to-the-ya!" The convinces outweigh the inconveniences more than the all the bail outs combined, and then times by 10. So, bring on the power I need to buy some shoes!
"Eye'z gotta bizounce!"
Lata tators!
Robocall
A prerecorded call that is sent to hundreds or thousands of telephone numbers. An automatic dialing computer goes through a targeted list of phone numbers.
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