Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Jan 7: Trying to do good!

Happy 2009, tators, and happy "National Old Rock Day." So, break out those LP's and the Hi-Fi's, tye-dye tee's, bell-bottoms with the happy face patch, s[port some rose colored glasses while you gently sway to the rhythm of Led Zep's "Stair Way To Heaven" or any other oldie but a goodie that you want to jam to. GET THE LED OUT!

Ok...
For 2009, I gave in and made a list of resolutions. Now, I know that I stated previously that I would not do this, but Carl-E kept on me like white on rice until I caved. My will power is fading with my beauty...

So...
One of my resolutions was to recycle more. This is one that I did post in my last bloggy, and at first it was ha-ha-funny, but I got to thinking. I nourish four cats with two cans of the most delectable feline delights each twice a day, Carl-E consumes enough seltzer water and Gator-Aid to fill the Atlantic ocean, and we receive so much junk mail despite asking kindly "Take us of your damn list!".

Well...
Like a responsible resident of the City of Atlanta, I ventured to their web site to uncover what is acceptable and what is rejected like the ugly child (NOTE: Every city is different, so I wanted to do it right!). A whole new world was open before my eyes; cereal boxes (NOTE: If broken down), directories (NOTE: The yellow pages are so 90's), and magazines (NOTE: My "In Touch" will find its way to the bin, only after I complete the Suduko) all got the thumbs up in addition to the old faithfuls; plastic bottles, tin cans, and paper.

Movin Forward...
The first week went as smooth as the finest cocoa ganache enrobing the most decadent, moist chocolate cake with sweet raspberry filling. This week, well kind of lumpy like rice pudding with raisins. Monday night, I rolled the bin to the curb and the next day; the recycle man was MIA. I conducted some recon and realized that no one's bin was emptied. So, I left it out another day just like everyone else.

Let's Leap Foward...
Today, was a Winnie-the-Pooh day; I noticed as I dusted the living room that we never use. And then, it happened! Two boys came walking down the street, eyed my recycling bin, and kicked the lid off like a pimp kicks a ho! And before you ask, "Oh no they didn't"! I will answer, "Oh, yes they did!" Paper started flying out of the bin and began to tumble down the street. It was like A shredder threw-up after indulging in one too many reams; paper everywhere.

Now...
One of my resolutions is to be more positive. So, the old Jersey me would of ran out there and verbal assulted the boys with expletives until they cried. But now it is the new me, I took a few deep breathes, open my door, and said to the boys, "Excuse me!" To which they both turned around. I proceeded to ask them, "Why did you kick my bin?" They both began to giggle, turned their backs to me, and started to walk away. Ok, now I felt the Jersey start to rear it's head. However, I surpressed the demoness and began to quickly pick up all of the junk mail that was still blowing out of the bin, and on to my neighbor's yard, and the next neighbor's yard that needs a desperate mowing, and the next neighbor's yard (NOTE: I told you it was a very windy day).

Next...
Before I know it, a lady that I did not know from Adam, walks by me while I am frantically trying to grab all the paper and repeating over and over again to myself that they are young boys and they do stupid things, etc. etc. As she passes me, our eyes lock, and she starts to chuckle and continues walking. That is when then I notice she is carrying two backpacks. Now, I have reached my limit. So, I yell out, "Hey!" She turns around and gives me that "How dare you talk to me in that tone of voice" look with a hand on her rather large hip. And to that I walked up to her until I was about 4 feet away, and said, "Teach your kids some F*&%in' manners and remember Karma is a bitch." And with that, I turned, walked away, and continued to pick up my papers. No, way am I blow my resolution to recycle. I mean it is all about Mother Earth, ya know?!

"Mission four:
Got the vintage Rolls
Drop a couple hundreds tell him leave it at the door"

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