Hey there, tators! This is my first post at Blogspot. I was a bloggin' on another site, but I was a payin' the big bucks. So, I decided to go the free route. Call me cheap, but now I'll have more dollas for my LV bags! Yippy!
Anywho...
Let's pick up with the Elbrus adventure!
Before we get to climb the real moutain; we do a bunch of evaluation hikes. Now, this is not what they are officially called, but any climber knows before they hit the mountain, the guide likes to evaluate each climber's ability. I cannot blame the guide, because you do not want one slow-ass climber holding up the show, ya know?!
So, we sent out for out first evaluation hike. The first part, the group was movin' and groovin'. When we took our first break, OCM andThe Prince were no where to be found. So, Igor set out to find them. Now, to be laggin' that far behind on the first hike=no good! After 10 minutes, no Igor, no COM, no Prince.
Because we could not wait any longer, our Fearful Leader took us the rest of the way up. Well, the other two never made it to the top. This situation was repeated on the next two evaluation hikes. Everyone knew that this was not good for COM and The Prince.
Finally, it's the day we head to the cabin on the mountain. We pack up our backpacks, and wait in a line for the ski lift. We did not wait 10 minutes, or 20 minutes; we waited 90 minutes. While we were waiting with half of Russia to get to the cabins (NOTE: The area where the cabin is, is also the area where the skiers start.), I decided to get a Bounty bar because breakfast was LAMB!
I walk over to the booth and wait for the guy to finish up with a woman that was buying a classical Russian mountain music CD. After she paid, he sat his fat tush down and lit a cigarette; all while looking at me. I said "Hello" in Russian, and then asked for a Bounty and a Snickers bar in Russian. He just stared at me. A snowboarder-rat stood next to me. The fatty got off his but, and asked her what she wanted. I was like, "I know you see me even though your eyes are practically covered by your fat eye-lids!" He asked the snowboarder-rat to ask me what I wanted. I told her the same thing I told him. She told him the same thing I told her. Guess what?! I got the dam candy bars! (NOTE: The words for Bounty and Snickers in Russian are Bounty and Snickers!)
Finally, after 90 minutes we arrive at the cabin. Now, we were told that each room had enough room to sleep 8 people comfortably in bunk beads. Well, the beds were not separate, it was one large bed. I slept with three men in the same bed and Carl-E was totally ok with it! That will be the only circumstance that he will give that situation a "thumbs up," I can assure you!
The first night in the cabin, I thought I was going to die. It was so hot and the bedrooms had no windows. I had to go outside, where it was about 10 degrees to cool down (NOTE: I repeated this numerous times, so sleep was minimal). And to add to the heat, everyone was sawin' logs, passin' gas, and tossin' and turnin'.
Well, it came time to get ready for the summit; we had a group pow-wow. Basically, our Fearful Leader told us that if we did not keep during the other hikes, we probably should not try to make the summit attempt. Well, believe-you-me COM was not taking to that bit of news. He started to rant and rave about how he could out climb anyone (NOTE: Delusional!). The Prince just kept quiet. Our Fearful Leader, COM, and The Prince went outside to have a chat. After an hour, COM and The Prince announce, rather loudly, that THEY have decided not to make the summit attempt. Secretly, we were all doing the happy dance inside.
After 8 hours of going up, up, up, we made it to the summit. I cried like a school girl. But, remember what goes up, must come down. So, after 5 hours of going down, down, down we reached the cabin, and crashed.
The next day, we left the mountain, took showers, and headed to a resturant for lunch. Now, this was the coolest resturant. You could fish for your own fish, they had a plethora of vegetables and chicken, not just LAMB! And best of all, ice, cold, draft, BEER! Well, we ordered a bunch of food, mucho beers, and commenced to par-they! Then to add to our experience, out came Natasha. She was our belly-dancin' entertainment. The guys were drollin'. Especially, The Prince. He was snapin' photos of every move she made. He took over 300 photos! Because we had lots of adult beverages, Natasha got many tips. She must of caught on, because she left, changed outfits, and danced again. This was repeated about 13 times. She made serious bank off us. At one point, Lil' J took out a wad of $5 and shoved in down her skirt.
Well, tators that's about it. I hope you enjoyed the rest of the Elbrus tale.
Until next time, later!
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